sometimes I like to talk like a gangsta

You were born to light up the world.  So um yeah.  Think about that and then think about how we are literally created from the elements of dead star explosions.  Like, we're alive because some star went supernovae out in the universe somewhere. So yeah.  Now go back to the first sentence.  You were born to light up the world.  Now connect the dots.  Form a "crazy thought constellation" as I now like to call it.  It's kind of like.... wonderfully ironic.  We're born to light up the world and we're created from stardust.  What now. And then like, the light of Christ, people.  It's all in us.  So we're more than just stars.  We're lights of Christ.  Which is why we're born to light up the world.  Right?  And we're stars..... okay okay, I keep repeating myself but it just hit me and IT'S A COOL THOUGHT OKAY. #sorrynotsorry #hatersgonnahate But it's like, so legit when you think about it that way.  Deep thoughts, bro.  Deep thoughts.  I'm pretty sure my mind was blown or went explosive-happy on me or something.  The heck.  I'm talking all mystical now.  But seriously, isn't it a wonderfully amazing connection?  Now go drink a tall glass of starlight and get out into the world and shine it up, yo. 

-written January 14, 2014

cause even the stars they burn, some even fall to the earth

::so I'm sitting here with this egg white/lime/honey mask on my face typing this blog post because last night one of my bffs told me to try it and my skin is in desperate need of pampering and so I did some more internet research on it (because that's what I do...some weird instinct of mine...research ALL the things!) and decided to try it
::my constant fear is that someone will knock on the door/ring the doorbell and because I'm the only one at home....I'll have to answer it... LOOKING LIKE THIS.
::also I'm pretty sure I have honey on my arms and hands which is probably gonna make this entire desk and keyboard super sticky
::I really really really hate fourteen hour workdays with a forty minute car-drive to my next job being my only break
::and when they're not fourteen hour workdays, they're eleven or twelve hour work days which isn't much better
::I miss finals week
::that was a piece of yummy cake compared to this
::mmmm speaking of cake... *stands up to go get something yummy*
::*Kimberly's shoulder angel intervenes* SIT BACK DOWN YOU'RE ON A DIET
::oh yeah... heh... I'm getting fat and I hate it
::but the only times I have to exercise on most days is either at 5:30am or 9:45pm and both those times I am just utterly. exhausted.
::maybe I should just suck it up and do it because I do NOT want to go to college this out of shape
::I'm counting down the days
::it's Tuesday, August 26th at exactly 2pm because you totally wanted to know that fact -_-
::kay so my two favorite songs this summer contradict each other
::what's up with that?
::I live on a perpetually low tank of gas
::or maybe it's just a perpetually low tank of feelings
::welcome to my walls, they're built to keep emotionally-damaging people out while I fit my life's puzzle pieces back together
::I just can't be vulnerable at the moment
::I get the feeling, though, that if I did Walls with the people I do NOT want to do Walls with, a lot of things would snap into place
::and I know there's this thing going around where it's like all the blog posts are "BE VULNERABLE" and "TAKE RISKS" and "JUMP OFF THE CLIFF INTO THE SWIRLING EMOTIONAL WHIRLWIND AND TAKE A CHANCE" and I'll probably write a blog post like that sometime
::but right now... I just can't.
::I literally do not have the energy to confront all of that
::I already broke down once this summer and it was awful
::no one was supposed to really know that so keep that on the low-down, kay? thanks a billion
::idk, just remember that everyone is broken somewhere inside even if they look happy and it seems like life's going for them and all that
::I mean, we're all human and we've all experienced pain and bad hair days
::so I should probably go wash this face mask off now...otherwise I'll  forget and start doing my secretary work which I'm supposed to be doing right now but I just couldn't bring myself to start and then get out of my pajamas and go to my other job with it still on
::the horror o.O
::bye now

[untitled one act play]

(The McGuire's Great Room, present day Bothwell. KIMBERLY is sprawled on her back in the middle of the room next to DADDY who is kneeling. Various other family members are in the room. The McGuire's have just finished family prayer.)

KIMBERLY: (moaning dramatically to DADDY) Daaaaaaaad, I'm at the age where everyone older than me has a very strong opinion about what I should do with my life which they always feel obligated to tell me and it always just so happens that their advice is against whatever I want to do. And I hate it!! It's like, people, thanks, but no thanks...can't you just be, like, supportive of what I want to do for once and not tell me that what I want to do is stupid and not profitable and is an all-around bad idea? (heavy sigh)

DADDY: (shifts to look down at KIMBERLY) ...mmmmmm....so you hate their advice? (stares down solemnly at KIMBERLY, but with a twinkle in his eye) Well, you know, I was just thinking this morning about how everything you're doing is a bad idea. (KIMBERLY audibly gasps) Yes, an awfully bad idea. And I think you should skip out on college and go be a hippie and live on the beach in a big van with.....a bunch of ex-convicts with tattoos! That's my advice.

KIMBERLY gasps in dramatic horror and slaps DADDY*

THE END

*on the knee